I'm a semi-pro geographer. I love places. In my quarter century of existence, I have visited 45 states. I've been to Seattle; Miami; Lost Springs, WY; Muskogee, OK; Los Angeles; Fargo, ND; Campbellsville, KY; Chicago; Ringgold, GA; and New York. I haven't technically been everywhere in the USA, but I'm pretty close. Whenever I decide to head out and am planning my route, I love researching unique locales and off-beat historic sites of interest. While I never have seen any place that claims to be the world's largest ball of twine, I did drag my pregnant wife on a five-day vacation in scenic Oklahoma. Highlights included the Washita Battlefield; Wichita Mountains Wildlife Refuge; Chattanooga, OK (such a place exists and was a "destination"); and Stockyard City in Oklahoma City. Almost two years later, we're still married. Did I mention it was over Christmas Break and it was freezing?
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| This could be anywhere in Big Eight Country |
I am a geography nerd. So much so that I enjoy the Great Plains. This region was dubbed the Great American Desert by the first European explorers to visit it. (Funny how words change meanings, isn't it? "Desert" also used to mean anywhere void of trees." I love the plainness of the plains. Nothing flashy can be found in Nebraska, Kansas, Oklahoma, Iowa, or Missouri (save Kansas City and St. Louis.) Calendars in the Great Plains are currently read that it is 1983 which mean that Reagan is still king and skinny jeans have not invaded. The men are men and women are women on the Plains. Original Coors is always on tap somewhere but never on the Lord's Day. A 50 foot gain in elevation can lead you to the highest point in a county and you can see for twenty miles. The people are religious, hard-working, hearty, friendly just like their ancestors who headed west for opportunity and didn't like having next-door-neighbors within a two mile radius. When I visit my second-favorite geographic region, I feel like I am stuck in a Wila Cather story. We hillbillies of Appalachia maintained our unique culture due to years of being cut off from polite society due to tough mountain topography; The people of the plains have been free from city-loving interlopers solely because no one else wants to live there. The summers are too hot, winters are too cold, and the movie theatre is too far away.
These people get each other. When you drive from Nebraska to Missouri to Oklahoma and all points in-between, nothing changes. Everybody here grows corn or raises cattle, you hear talk of wishbone and T-formation offenses, and everyone hates their team's border rival. With that being said, change is slowly creeping in.
When the SEC admitted Arkansas and South Carolina to form the first-ever 12 team super conference, the game changed forever. When the SEC added these teams it gained the ability to play a conference championship game and make more money. Roy Kramer was hailed as a hero in Dixie and a crook everywhere else, especially the state of Texas. South Carolina had been an independent looking for a home in 1991 and chose the SEC over the ACC. Arkansas had been a competitive member of the old Southwest Conference and its leaving was primarily motivated by the University of Texas' misplaced superiority complex. Arkansas AD at the time, Frank Broyles feared that Texas would bolt the SWC for the Pac-10. I don't play the lottery but if I ever do, I will call this man. Arkansas' leaving signaled the end of the Texas-centric SWC. In 1996, the member institutions of the Big Eight, led by Oklahoma, pursued Texas, Texas A&M, Texas Tech, and Baylor and invited them to the Big Eight. The Big Eight soon became the Big XII, the second super conference with a title game. 12 team conferences cannot play round-robin schedules so divisional play is set up. The SEC maintained important rivalries like the Third Saturday in October and the Deep South's Oldest Rivalry with its new divisions. The Big XII did away with yearly meetings between Oklahoma and Nebraska, the marquee rivalry of the Big Eight. The Nebraska-Oklahoma rivalry generally determined who the Big Eight would send to the Orange Bowl every year and the winner usually was among the top teams in the nation in the final AP poll. Now granted, the payout to each school grew in the new Big XII due to the new conference championship game but the magic was gone, never to return. Big Eight conference titles used to signify which state was king of the plains but, with the accompaniment of the BCS, that too had gone out the window. College football had gone from regional sport to national industry.
After years of bickering with Texas and trying to reestablish a yearly contest with Oklahoma, Nebraska packed up the tent and moved in with the Big Ten. Colorado accepted a big to join the Pac-12 with whom it always more closely resembled culturally. Missouri attempted to get an invite to the Big Ten and told the world about it, only to be left waiting for a phone call that never came. Texas flirted with taking the Oklahoma schools and Texas A&M with it to the Pac-12. These moves would have left Iowa State, Missouri, Kansas, and Kansas State in the freezing cold. Texas A&M finally broke free of big brother Texas and joined the SEC and Missouri came along with them. The Big XII decided to bring in old SWC standby TCU and West Virginia. As Bob Dylan sang in the 60s, "oh the times they are a-changin'."
Think of the geography of conference realignment: West Virginia's closest conference "rival" is Iowa State which is a paltry 841 miles away. Missouri is in the same division as Florida. Let that soak in. The state of Texas really is its own geographic region but if a team ever culturally belonged in the SEC, it would be Texas A&M. I take very little umbrage with the Aggies joining the SEC. As a Tennessee fan, I love the idea of Texas A&M hosting Florida the week before the Gators will get beat in Knoxville. As a SEC fan, I enjoy the idea of watching Texas A&M play Alabama, LSU, Arkansas, and others on a regular basis; I like the idea of Missouri challenging Kentucky for conference dominance. (Speaking of Missouri, I really warmed up to them when their fans chanted "ESSS EEEE CEEE" as they won their last ever Big XII basketball championship in Kansasa City.) Colorado and Utah joining the Pac-10 is a non-starter for me. Yes, some Pac-10 teams are good but they don't have real fans who care so neither do I. Gun to my head, I'd like to see a real Mountain West conference with Utah, BYU, Colorado, Boise State, and a few other jokers to round out the conference to 8-12 teams. What I don't like seeing is the simple people of the plains no longer having real geographically-fueled hate to hold on to. Severe topography leads to severe people which leads to severe hate. What will they do with all of this resentment they used to cherish? I would die if Tennessee lost Alabama as a conference-mate. Kansas and Missouri rivalry dates back to the 1850s when Missourians attempted to set the state of Kansas on fire and we will never see this as a yearly-series again.
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| This is what rivalry hate looks like |
I've been all over the map literally and figuratively with this post. I could go on further but no one is even reading this now. The Great Plains people, history, sports, geography, and culture are truly an American treasure. Money and Texas killed the Big Eight Conference and all of its regional glory. In memorial, you travel the back roads of the Great Plains. I know where you can get the best hamburger in Cottonwood Falls, KS and know plenty of fascinating places in Nebraska. Class dismissed.
Riveting. Has Newsweek called you yet?
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